


I've Got High Hopes (for Me and You)

by cafephan



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Fluff, Marriage, Wedding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-20
Updated: 2015-07-20
Packaged: 2018-04-10 07:56:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,733
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4383611
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cafephan/pseuds/cafephan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It’s Dan and Phil’s wedding day, and they’ve written their own vows. After not having seen each other for days prior, every word is that much more sincere.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I've Got High Hopes (for Me and You)

“I can do this, I can do this” Phil Lester repeated to himself as he paced around the room, occasionally catching sight of his reflection in the wall-length mirror.

When he finally stopped to take a good look, he noticed the changes from the norm. His eyes were brighter, his skin was positively glowing, and his smile had never been more genuine.

Because today, he was long-term committing to the love of his life.

Today was his wedding day.

Soon enough an employee of the building scurried in, carrying a hefty bundle of papers in her hands. Her nametag read Abbie, and so far Phil had become acquainted with three employees, none of which were the woman stood in front of him, grinning.

“Are you getting nervous?” she asked, and Phil nodded slowly, there was no point in lying. So many things could go wrong, and they were now less than an hour away before the ceremony was to begin.

“Well, you have some guests that have arrived early, but the previous ceremony is still occurring, so they cannot be seated yet, they’re out in the waiting room if you want to go and greet them” Abbie informed as she walked over to one of the filing cabinets to retrieve even more papers.

Phil took it as his cue to leave.

He cautiously walked out of the room and into the main lobby of the building, which wasn’t all that big in itself anyway. Zoe, Alfie and Louise all jumped up from their seats and ran over.

“You’ve scrubbed up well” Louise joked, the crack in her voice justifying the reason for the crumpled tissue balled in her fist. Phil put an arm around her shoulders as he began to speak to Zoe and Alfie.

“How are you holding up?” Alfie asked, and Phil sighed.

“I could be better, I’m just constantly thinking of what could go wrong” he revealed, and Alfie nodded in understanding.

“Nothing’s going to go wrong, Phil. Everything’s planned to a T, and there’s no room for anything to mess up” Zoe assured him with a smile, but it didn’t help all that much.

“He could not turn up” Phil babbled, and Zoe shook her head.

“We popped by your flat before coming here. Believe me, he’ll be here” she replied knowingly, and Phil was left to wonder what the hell that could even mean.

“You need faith in your wedding planner” Louise commented from beside Phil, seemingly having recovered from her initial shock.

“I have every faith in you, my friend” Phil joked, and Louise beamed as she retrieved her phone.

She typed out what seemed like a few messages whilst Zoe and Alfie worked on calming Phil down, as when he heard the applause and cheers from the ceremony room for the previous wedding, anxiety and fear were set in stone.

“So, um, not to make you any worse or anything, but your fiancé- very soon to be husband is on his way” Louise spoke calmly as she flipped the phone around to show the messages to Phil.

_We’re waiting for the limo_

_Okay it’s here_

_I’m so nervous_

_Tell me he’s there_

_Also tell him I love him_

“Then let’s waste no more time” a voice from behind the group suggested, and Tracey, an employee whom Phil had met earlier in the day, emerged and ushered Phil back into the room he was in previously, and told the three guests they could go to the ceremony room as soon as the other guests had now vacated.

Abbie was still hard at work doing whatever, and Tracey was being Phil’s personal stylist, fixing his tie and jacket. Why he had insisted for his parents and brother to go in the limo with Dan and his family he didn’t know, it was a weird decision, in hindsight.

“Only fifteen minutes to go, how are you feeling?” Tracey asked, and it sent Phil into a state of overthinking. He had a million and one emotions whizzing around his head at lightning speed, it was impossible for one to be at the forefront. Evidently, his silence was enough, as Tracey nodded and assured him everything would be fine.

A knock on the door interrupted the last minute assurances, as Samantha, another employee, poked her head around and announced that the limo was approximately a minute from arriving, and Phil should probably head to the ceremony room as to not see Dan before the ceremony itself was conducted.

He wasted no time, and shuffled out of the room back into the now empty lobby, and began the lengthy walk down the corridor, the ceremony room’s open doors anything but welcoming. Fear was now dominating, and his nerves were definitely getting the better of him.

Zoe, Alfie and Louise were already seated on the third row on one side of the room (the first two traditionally being reserved for family) and all shot Phil a thumbs up as he entered.

“Can you tell me when he’s here, please?” he asked Zoe, who was on the end of the row, and she nodded.

Louise then stood up and walked to the front of the room, and clicked play on the sound system, the compilation CD she had chosen beforehand as part of her role as wedding planner beginning to play.

“They may be kind of cliché but you’ll thank me” she told Phil with a smile before hugging him tightly and returning to her seat.

Phil couldn’t focus on what was playing at the moment, all he could focus on was that Zoe had told him that Dan had arrived, and was being ushered into the room that Phil hadn’t left that long ago, and now that more guests were arriving, along with his brother who was running down the corridor at full speed.

“As the best man I think I should’ve been here before this, don’t you?” he enquired jokingly, and Phil again regretted his earlier decision.

“I messed up, I know. But bigger picture, please?” Phil replied in a panic, and his brother placed a hand on his shoulder.

“I know you’re stressing, and in spite of how funny I find it, you are genuinely going to be fine. You have a guy in there who loves you more than life itself, and he wants to marry you more than anything else in this world. After spending the whole morning being a supportive ear for his worries, believe me, you’re the calm one” whether his brother was exaggerating or not, it was exactly what Phil needed to hear.

He had no time to thank him properly, as guests were filing in quickly, and Phil had to greet them all. Soon enough, every seat was filled with family and friends (both YouTube and real life), and Dan’s brother had joined Phil and his best man at the front, being Dan’s best man himself.

“So this is actually happening” Phil whispered to himself as he took a deep breath and looked down at his shoes, hands interlocked in front of him.

\--

“I can’t believe this day is actually here” Dan Howell gushed as he took one last look in the mirror, and turned to face his mother and grandmother, whom held his and Phil’s two-month old daughter Kaylee in her arms.

His mother took a step forward and ran a hand through her son’s hair and brought the other up to wipe away a tear, as she looked in awe at the boy that was once so sad, so beyond help, look back at her with more compassion and emotion than she would ever have thought possible.

“I think I’m ready” Dan stated with a deep breath, and his grandmother nodded, handing Kaylee to Dan’s mother and stepping outside into the lobby.

“You’re getting married, Dan” his mother sobbed, carefully angling Kaylee so she could dab at her eyes again, and Dan nodded slowly.

“Yeah, it sure looks that way” he replied, feeling a tingle in his fingers.

Then, his grandmother returned, followed by a woman with a nametag reading Samantha.

“Mr Howell, we’re all ready for you in there” she smiled, and Dan nodded again, not knowing what else he could do without shedding a tear.

“I guess we’ll see you in there” his grandmother smiled as she placed Kaylee into her carrier, and the two left, meaning it was actually happening.

Today was his wedding day, and he was getting married to the love of his life.

And that, you can’t make that kind of thing up.

He followed Samantha out of the room and slowly walked up the corridor, stopping a few steps from the doorway at Samantha’s signal, but she carried on inside, leaving Dan alone.

His arrival turned a few heads from the guests that were seated in a position that could see him, and he immediately noticed Louise sobbing silently into a tissue, and a teary-eyed Zoe beside her, Alfie stretching over to hold her hand.

Joe, Caspar and Carrie all smiled in reassurance as they obviously picked up on how Dan’s nerves were currently in overdrive, but their gaze soon returned to the front of the room as the familiar voice of Samantha centralised all of the guests’ attention.

“Ladies and gentlemen, please be upstanding for the arrival of Daniel Howell” she announced, and everyone in the room synchronously arose and flicked their gazes to the doorway, where Dan’s legs began to shake.

He heard 18 by One Direction playing quietly from the room, and he focused on the music rather than how many stares were on him, it gave a slight confidence boost. Very slowly, he put one foot in front of the other and stepped into the room, hearing the occasional sniffle from somewhere in the room as he walked.

As soon as he turned the corner, he saw him.

Stood with his back to the room, seemingly as stiff as a board, just waiting. His foot was tapping out of time with the music, and it made Dan smile slightly, it seemed that Phil was just as nervous. Both his and Phil’s brothers smiled at Dan as he inched his way further to the front of the room, and Samantha and another employee named Tracey smiled in encouragement also.

In what seemed a never-ending instant, Dan was stood beside Phil at the front of the room, but he hadn’t dared look at his face. He didn’t want to cry, at least not yet. He hadn’t seen Phil in three days, as they foolishly thought it would be better to not see each other for a while before the wedding to make the moment better, and Dan didn’t think it would be possible to miss someone so much.

He shot a look to Kaylee, who was now sat on his mother’s lap, and quickly noticed Phil’s head turned in the same direction. They turned back at the same time, but caught each other’s gaze. Immediately, tears seemed to pool at the bottom of Phil’s eyes, and Dan could feel his doing the same, but blinked in a fruitless attempt at eradicating them.

But he had never been more sure.

He wanted to marry Phil Lester, and he wanted to make sure everyone knew it.

\--

“Thankyou, please be seated” Samantha instructed, and the guests followed. The music stopped, and the room fell silent for a few seconds before Samantha continued.

Phil took the time Samantha was stating the basic outlines of the ceremony to cast another look at his soon to be husband, and couldn’t help but break out into a wide smile. Dan was darting his gaze around the room, admiring the décor that Louise had chosen, and was smiling to himself. But it was when Dan turned to face Phil that he really took notice.

He didn’t care that they were getting married at a registry office and not a big, boasting church. He didn’t care that they had sacrificed stag nights and chose to have a cosy movie night instead. He didn’t care that he’d had to get another suit at the last minute because the first was badly stained. He didn’t care because he had Dan Howell, right now, holding his hand and willing to marry him, and that’s all he really cared about.

“Okay, are we ready to begin?” Samantha asked, and Dan and Phil both nodded, but never took their gazes off of each other.

“I am” they replied synchronously.

\--

“It is a blessing upon the world when two people, any two people, find each other and fall in love. Love is a thing that cannot be measured, nor can it be forced, or traded, but it can be ignited. We are gathered here today to celebrate the love shared between Daniel and Philip, and I am delighted to be the one to make it official” Samantha began, and Dan’s smile grew a little wider.

“Is your full name Philip Michael Lester?” she asked Phil, and he nodded.

“It is”

“And it is your wish to marry Daniel James Howell?”

“It is” he replied, with no change in tone, no wavering.

“Is your full name Daniel James Howell?” she asked Dan, and he nodded, as Phil did previously.

“And it is your wish to marry Philip Michael Lester?”

“It is” he replied, struggling to not choke on any of his words, as tears were teetering on his waterline with every passing second. It was actually happening.

“Before we continue, I must ask as required by law, if there is anyone who objects to Daniel and Philip being joined in matrimony, please speak it now” Samantha addressed the room full of guests, and Dan tensed, just waiting for life to screw him over and someone to scream a reason why Dan wasn’t good enough for Phil. But nobody did. Only a single sob (which Dan was sure belonged to Louise) interrupted the silence, and Phil took his hand again, and squeezed it softly.

“Both Daniel and Philip have written their own vows, which we will get to in due course. Firstly, the exchanging of rings. The rings are a traditional way of symbolising the love shared by a couple, it’s never-ending shape connoting that of the love of their owners. We will now begin” Samantha pointed towards the ring cushion on the table beside the marriage register, and Phil’s brother brought it over, and held it between Dan and Phil.

“Philip, please take the ring intended for Daniel,” Samantha paused as Phil retrieved the ring, and met Dan’s gaze. A rogue tear dropped onto Dan’s hand, and he silently cursed himself for not being able to compose himself. But he knew it was all alright, because he had Phil rubbing comforting circles onto the top of his hand, and the gold ring held in his palm meant that Phil was prepared to spend the rest of his life with him, regardless of what may come in the future. He was prepared to be Dan’s forever, and there was nothing more surreal. Samantha then continued, it seemed as if out of the blue.

“Place it on his third finger from the left,” she paused for Phil to do just that. Phil gently took hold of Dan’s hand again and Dan curled every finger except the one needed, to make the task easier. Phil twisted the ring onto Dan’s finger, and Dan let out a shaky laugh at Phil’s unconventional way of placing a ring, and Phil replicated it.

Phil then rubbed the pad of his thumb over the newly placed ring, and smiled at Dan after doing so. His eyes were sparkling, and it made Dan overjoyed that he was the cause.

He was mere minutes away from being lawfully wedded to the man that had single handedly saved him from a life of misery and regret, from spiralling sadness and a dead-end career. Phil Lester had saved his life, and here he was placing a wedding ring on Dan’s finger in front of a room full of witnesses.

\--

“Please repeat after me” Samantha requested, and Phil tore his gaze away from Dan’s momentarily to nod in understanding to Samantha, whom grinned and mouthed ‘you’re doing great!’ which put Phil at ease, just a little.

“I, Philip Michael Lester,” she stopped to let Phil repeat,

“I, Philip Michael Lester” he repeated as he looked into Dan’s eyes, and squeezed his hands as he noticed Dan’s eyes begin to water.

“Take you, Daniel James Howell”

“Take you, Daniel James Howell” it didn’t seem as if Phil was even repeating Samantha’s words anymore, it seemed as natural and unscripted as his vows, which he had yet to share.

“To be my lawfully wedded husband” Phil spoke with as much sincerity as he could muster. Dan’s bottom lip began to tremble as a result of Phil’s words, and as he couldn’t kiss Dan quite yet, Phil squeezed his hands again as he continued with his declarations.

“I promise to love you, cherish you, value you, and be with you forevermore” Phil could tell that it was taking all of Dan’s power not to sob, but he had little time to act upon it in terms of comfort as Samantha’s attention had turned to Dan.

\--

“Daniel, please take the ring intended for Philip” Samantha instructed, and Phil’s brother held out the ring cushion to make the task easier. Phil too curled each finger except for the intended as Dan did before, and Dan appreciated it, as his vision was currently clouded due to overpowering emotion that he needed to spill. Any difficulty with such a simple endeavour would have ended in inevitable disaster.

He slipped the ring onto Phil’s finger, and watched on as Phil stared down at the ring with childlike delight, his lips parting as he broke into a wide grin, which put Dan at ease, so much so that he felt like he could speak confidently. Because he had only seen Phil so happy on a handful of occasions – when Dan agreed to move in with him, when he hit one and two million subscribers, and when Dan had agreed to marry him.

“Daniel, please repeat after me” Samantha requested, and Dan nodded, but didn’t – _couldn’t –_ tear his gaze away from the man in front of him, who had now let go of one of Dan’s hands in order to study his ring closely, the delight and genuine glee never leaving his expression.

“I, Daniel James Howell,” he began after repeating Samantha, and by now Phil was paying full attention, only seldom looking down at their matching rings, “Take you, Philip Michael Lester,” he paused as Samantha did, and swallowed down any anxiety that previously shadowed the blinding  affection, as he spoke Phil’s full name. Normally the two laugh in the face of formality, but today was the one day for which they would both make an exception.

“To be my lawfully wedded husband” Dan stressed every syllable in an attempt to make it clear to Phil just how much he meant the words he was speaking, which didn’t even seem like repetition, they felt natural, and were real and true.

“I promise to love you, cherish you, value you, and be with you forevermore” he spoke as he ran a couple of fingers over the newly placed ring on Phil’s hand, causing Phil to blush slightly when their skin made contact again.

“That’s perfect Daniel, well done” Samantha praised quietly, and Dan smiled at her words.

“We will now proceed to the vows which Philip has written for Daniel” Samantha announced and held a hand out to Phil, signalling the floor was his, and she wouldn’t be intervening until he was finished.

\--

Phil cleared his throat nervously as he shuffled position slightly, and noticed out of his peripheral vision that his brother was stepping beside him holding out the slip of paper that Phil had written the outline of his vows on.

He was about to reach for it, but first locked gazes with his (very nearly) husband. Upon seeing Dan’s curious stare and wide eyes, he shook his head at his brother, and he stepped back with an understanding nod.

Dan raised an eyebrow at Phil’s action, and mouthed ‘are you sure?’ to which Phil nodded. Because he was, he was ready to tell Dan Howell just how much he wanted to marry him, and there no way he was going to follow words he’d edited a million times, he wanted this to come from the heart. The words needed to be unadulterated and pure.

He took a deep breath and suddenly realised that they were surrounded by tons of people, all of whom were staring on eagerly and preparing to be hanging on his every word. His father shot him a thumbs up and his mother pressed her hands to her heart adoringly. Kaylee gurgled in Dan’s mother’s arms, then giggled as she had her stomach tickled. Zoe, Louise and Carrie were all sporting tear streaks down their cheeks, and Alfie had a tight hold of Zoe’s hand, their embrace in between their laps.

But then he tuned back into the only person that mattered in the moment. The man that he was more than willing to pledge his life to. The man that he was more than willing to die for. The man who was nodding in encouragement for Phil to continue.

The man he couldn’t wait to call his husband.

“Dan,” he began, but his voice was ripe with emotion, and he cleared his throat again before continuing. But Dan was smiling and squeezing Phil’s hands as if saying there was no rush, and it was just another reason why Phil had never been surer of anything in his life.

“Dan, there was once a time when I had given up” his words were tumbling out of his mouth before his logic had a chance to process them, and they were raw. They were real, and by the way Dan’s lips were now pressed together, they were intriguing.

“I was bullied perilously, called every name under the sun, and I just wanted to disappear. Delete myself from life. Be gone. There was once a time when I felt as if life was going nowhere, and I had next to nothing to live for. Every night would end in floods of tears, and it was impacting on everyone I had contact with, strangers in the street would ask if there was anything they could do, any way they could help me. I told them I wanted love, I wanted a reason to be” at some point Phil had closed his eyes, and as he didn’t want to relive the memory of the time he was referring to, he snapped his eyes open and was greeted with a teary-eyed Dan, bottom lip again trembling, and gripping onto Phil’s hands for dear life. But he was far from finished.

“The few friends I had were starting to settle down, and I had yet to be in a relationship. I had a degree or two that were just going to waste, so I started taking these silly little video blogs I started years ago more seriously. I did it because I was terrified. I was terrified that I was unlovable, I had no idea what was wrong with me, why didn’t anyone love me the way my friends were loved, why I was so constantly alone, all the time. I wanted to know what it felt like to be so wrapped up in a person that the whole world kind of melts away, I wanted a lifelong best friend and a soulmate wrapped into one, I wanted to know what it felt like to be in love.”  Dan’s eyes were now streaming with tears, and he whispered “me too” breathlessly as he let go of one of Phil’s hands to wipe his eyes, which Phil took as his cue to continue.

“But then I noticed a boy, a boy with chestnut hair similar to mine but swept the other way, I started to notice him a lot. We began to speak, up to the point it was nearly hourly, and he said he was just as lonely as I was. We had similar back stories, and soon the lonely nights were filled with the company of video chats, and the normally hollow crevices in the bare walls of my flat echoed my laughter, which was caused by the silly thing that had happened to you that day, and I knew from way back then that you were something special. You were a huge part of my life from the very beginning and you didn’t even know it.”

Dan attempted to blink back more tears but clung onto Phil’s hands with sheer determination, engrossed in what he was saying even though tears were still freely falling down his cheeks.

“I remember the day I asked you to come and meet me in Manchester, you were so happy. You danced around your room, flailing your arms around, and then booked your ticket straight away. I remember when the day rolled around and I waited anxiously at the train station, wondering if I’d made a mistake, I thought I would lose the most important person in my life. I thought you would be disappointed with me when I’m not talking to you through pixels, that you’d turn straight back around and get back on the train and wonder why you’d even bothered talking to me in the first place. But you didn’t. You dropped your bags, uncaring that they nearly fell down the side of the platform, and ran straight into my arms. As I was holding you, it dawned on me that you were actually real, my idea of perfection was real, and I was holding it, and it was happy to be in my presence. You snuggled into my chest as you sobbed, repeating that you couldn’t believe you were there with me, and I cried too. I cried so much, because you didn’t look back” Phil heard a sob from the side of him, and out of his peripheral vision saw Samantha and Tracey wiping their eyes, but didn’t want to stop yet. He needed Dan to know this, more so than any other time he had told him the same story. A large quantity of their guests were emotional too as the occasional sob or frequent sniffle could be heard, which echoed from the hollow walls.

“I remember the first time we kissed, it was in my living room. You were shorter than me and looked up at me with wide eyes, and bit your lip. I had next to no experience with romance and had no idea what was going on, I just couldn’t process and get over the fact that you were there in person, and you were happy being with me. You asked if you could try something, and I was confused as to why you’d ask. _What’s mine is yours,_ I said, and you giggled, you replied _I’d like to have your lips,_ and then we kissed. It was sweet and slow, but oh so perfect. I remember the day I asked you to move in with me, it was after you had spent the night sobbing in my arms about how you had messed up your life, and you regretted university and you regretted where you lived, because it was so far from me. I was somewhat hesitant to ask in fear you’d think it was too soon, but you enveloped me in a hug and peppered my face with kisses, screaming ‘yes’ over and over again. The drawer of stuff you had at my flat soon multiplied, and the flame of affection I held for you had spread like wildfire, only ignited further when we officially moved our relationship up a notch. I was completely, unequivocally in love with you, Daniel Howell, even back then, and I still don’t regret a second of it now.” Phil took a second to swallow the lump in his throat that had formed whilst speaking the words he meant every phoneme of, and he moved his gaze to the floor as he did so. He didn’t want to see Dan’s expression until he had finished completely, he had come too far to break down on the home stretch of his vows.

“I remember when I proposed. I had distracted you with a stupidly long text post on tumblr that I had on my laptop in our room, and I was down on one knee in the living room for about ten minutes, I wasn’t the best at planning,” he heard Dan giggle from in front of him and a few guests do the same through their sobs, and smiled himself knowing that he hadn’t made a complete idiot of himself quite yet.

“And then you walked in, you didn’t notice at first. I had to cough to make myself known, and then you realised. You gasped, and lost balance, and toppled to the floor to my level. You asked a million times if I was sure, and I was quite surprised you thought so, I never have made an effort to hide my love for you. You cried, we both cried so much, and you managed to say yes in amidst your sobs and hiccups. You admired the ring for hours, and I just watched on with a smile. I cried so much that day, do you remember? I cried so much because I was so, so irreversibly in love with you, and there you were wearing an engagement ring I proposed with. I cried so much because you had learned to love me too” Phil himself was crying at his own words now, and felt hot tears run down his cheeks, yet he still didn’t dare to look at Dan. He cast a quick glance to some of the guests, and there didn’t appear to be a dry eye in the house.

But there was one final thing Phil had to say.

“Dan, I can’t begin to say how blissfully happy you’ve made my life since you entered it all those years ago. And I’ve never looked back. If you’d let me, which I pray more for than I’ve prayed more than anything in my life, I want to spend the rest of my life making sure that I can make you even a minuscule percentage as happy as you’ve made me. I want our future to be us and our beautiful daughter, and I suppose what I’m saying is that I might make mistakes, I might not be the perfect husband, I might still eat your cereal and occasionally leave the tv on in the living room before we go to bed, but you will always be my priority. My life and my future since two thousand and nine have consisted of brown hair and brown eyes, and crater-deep dimples. I love you, and I can only hope you love me enough to be my forever”  

He dared to look up, and met a hysterical Dan, who threw himself into Phil’s arms. Phil wrapped his arms around Dan and hugged him tightly, although refraining from kissing him was one of the hardest things he’d ever had to do.

When Dan pulled away, he wiped his eyes a final time and took hold of Phil’s hands once again, and turned to Samantha and nodded, apparently replying to something Phil hadn’t heard her say.

“We will now proceed to the vows Daniel has written for Philip”

\--

Blood was pounding Dan’s ears as his nerves were creeping up on him again, and as Samantha handed over to Dan the thudding only intensified.

But then he made eye contact with Phil, who, despite having tears running from his eyes, smiled in encouragement, and rubbed his thumb supportively over Dan’s hand, and such a simple gesture boosted his confidence significantly.

He hadn’t written his vows down, as he had practised them so much in the mirror over the last few days they were practically branded into his brain with a hot iron, although he was planning on scrapping a lot of it, as he wanted to speak freely and unrehearsed, as Phil did.  Because there were a few more things he needed to tell Phil, the kind of things that cannot be said under any other condition than spontaneity.

“Phil, I genuinely don’t know where to begin. I just can’t believe this actually happening, that I’m standing here with you, never mind that we’re in suits with matching golden rings and declaring our love to the world,” he began, and Phil chuckled, which put Dan at ease further.

“I didn’t have the best childhood, bullied every day, only occasionally physical. I had been moulded to believe that I was worthless, that I had no future, and that nobody could ever learn to like me, or anything more. I believed it. I believed their words for the longest time. I was lost, lost in a sea of self-loathing, to which even professional help couldn’t get me out of. But then I found you, and as soon as I clicked onto that first video, with the floppy haired guy with the faded northern accent, my future was as bright as your eyes. The sparse amount of friends I had just told me I was stupid for admiring you as much as I did, for that matter still do, but I knew you were something different. It wasn’t just a mindless crush teenagers get on a random movie star or pop star. Because I could see behind the straightened hair and contact lenses, I could tell you were as lonely and as close to giving up as me” he paused to swallow the lump in his throat that was caused by reliving some of his darkest days.

“I remember exactly where I was when you first replied to me, as sad as that sounds. But I’ll never forget, because it signified the official start of the brightest chapter of my life, the one I’m still living right now, the chapter in which you are my main character and grace every page. I was having a particularly bad day, and was in a regular fit of tears, it wasn’t an unusual occurrence. I usually kept it bottled up for my parents’ sake, but they were both working and my brother was at his friend’s house, so I let it all out. I cursed the name of every single bully, and I wished for death. I wished to disappear, I wished to just not hurt anymore. All I could remember was negativity and self-hatred, and I was sick of it. I had only heard of love in corny pop songs and my mum’s romance novels, I thought it was a publicity stunt, and I sure as hell would never get to experience it. But I got a notification, my crappy phone woke me out of my tear induced slumber, and the actual AmazingPhil had tweeted me back, safe to say more tears were shed, but they were of a different calibre,” Dan paused again to make eye contact with Phil, who was smiling softly and looking at his shoes, but Dan saw a tear float along his eyelashes.

“We had a thread of tweets about films, it wasn’t exactly the bonding experience I’d wanted with one of my favourite people considering I’d sent you admiring tweets too, but it was a start. And we continued speaking, via DMs and then gradually via Skype. You have no idea, Phil, how long I prepared for those daily video calls. I’d iron every shirt I wore right before I called, and I’d flat iron every hair on my head. I didn’t want to give a reason for you not to want to speak to me anymore, because, you didn’t know it back then, but I was dependent on you, very much so, and I was slowly but surely falling in love with you, and I was steadily coming to terms with the fact that I couldn’t live without you”  Dan felt Phil rub the pad of his thumb against his hand, but Dan couldn’t bring himself to make eye contact just yet, he needed to deliver his piece first, otherwise he wouldn’t have a chance.

“I remember when you first asked to meet me, and what you saw was only the start. Once we’d hung up I opened my bedroom window and screamed it to the whole town, just because I was that ecstatic. I’d began to notice that your eyes had more joy and life in them in recent videos, and I wondered if just maybe I’d had something to do with it, and the potential for that to be a reality only fuelled my passion to press book on that train ticket, I needed to tell you how I felt, in one form or another, because I was sure something was special about what we shared, and I wasn’t in a teenage romance haze,” he paused again to wipe his eyes, and heard a random sob from somewhere in the room, but eschewed it, “when I stepped off the train, I had no idea if you would even be there. I was convinced I was being trolled, I remember thinking why anyone, never mind someone as unbelievably beautiful and gentle as yourself, would be interested in me. But then, I saw you, clear as day, in your checked shirt and hands stuck awkwardly in your pockets” He noticed Phil’s lips curl into a wider smile, which he felt a sense of self satisfaction that he had caused.

“I kind of forgot about everything else, like where we were, how many people were around and how many bags I was carrying. All I cared about was the fact you were real, and you were here to meet me, and I launched myself at you. I was worried that you’d inch away in disgust, but instead you opened your arms and let me run into you, and you wrapped your arms around me, and that was only the beginning. The first time we kissed, as you said, I kind of initiated it. I just wanted to know if I was playing a losing game, or if you held something for me too. When I felt you kiss me back, I can’t even explain to you how it felt. It would be terribly cliché to say perfect, although it was. When you asked me to move in with you, it was the second happiest day of my life, second only to meeting you. My life felt as if it was a dead end, and again, you saved me. You saved me the guilt and pressures, just with a simple sentence. I was slowly realising you were the one, and it terrified me that you could break me with a simple negativity or rejection, even though I know you never would. Being able to declare myself as your boyfriend soon after was without a doubt my best achievement in life, the fact that I could say I had someone who loved me for me was the best middle finger to the bullies I could have imagined. It was me and you against the world, and for that I thank you. There’s nobody else I would rather be isolated at YouTube events with, host countless events with and spend my life with. Which brings us to the present,” Dan gulped as he was ready to deliver the last section of his vows. He was aware both he and Phil had probably gone overboard on the length of their vows, but this was their day to share their love with each other and the world, and just wanted the other to know exactly how they felt.

“I wasn’t sure why you showed me a text post about different kind of cheeses that day, the day you proposed. I remember stepping out of the room and looking around for you to interrogate why I had just been shown the pros and cons of cheddar and brie, only to be broken out of my exploration by a not so subtle cough from below me. You were crouched on one knee holding out a velvet box with a gleaming ring reflecting my shock. My legs gave way almost immediately, and I fell to the ground with a hand around my mouth, still not believing what was happening. My ears were buzzing as my mind whizzed trying to process what was happening, but your words rang true as you told me you loved me and that you wanted to marry me. As soon you asked _will you marry me_ I just lost it, and jumped on you in a fit of tears and shaky laughter. You stayed sat on the carpet and I sat on your lap with my arms around your neck, asking over and over if you were sure, and you laughed every time and pulled me closer. Over your shoulder, I kept admiring the ring as it caught the light, and every so often I saw my eyes in it. Bright, sparkling, passionate. All because of you” Dan heard a light sob from in front of him, and ran his thumb supportively across Phil’s hand, a sign that he was nearly done and that he wouldn’t have to hear much more tear-jerking speech.

There was just one more thing Dan needed to say.

“You saved me, Phil Lester, and I want you to know that. You saved the boy who had nothing and nobody to care. You taught me how to love, and in turn you taught me how to learn to love myself. They say to never meet your heroes, but boy were they wrong. Meeting you was the best thing I’ve ever done in my twenty-four years of life, and I want to spend the rest of my years trying to show you just how much I mean that. I want to grow old with you, and tell our grandchildren the story of how we met, because I don’t regret it, not one tiny bit. I was broken, and you fixed me. You’re my best friend, my soulmate, and if you’re sure, your husband, because I think we should be in this for the long haul. I want to spend my life with you, and I want everyone on earth to know that” Dan took a deep breath as he finished his vows, proud that he managed to formulate functioning sentences rather than just babbling and repeating ‘I love you’ a thousand times, as that’s what his subconscious tells him to do most of the time whenever he’s around Phil.

He waited a few seconds for Samantha to spring back into life, and out of the corner of his eye he noticed her dab her eyes, then straighten her posture and take a step towards them.

“Okay so Daniel and Philip have made their very touching vows and declarations to each other, which leaves me with only two questions” she stated, and both men tensed, knowing what was coming. Despite what had happened thus far, the following questions were what mattered most in terms of the actual marriage.

“Philip Michael Lester, do you take Daniel James Howell to be your lawfully wedded husband?” Samantha asked with eager eyes.

Phil turned to face Dan once again and they made eye contact, which neither made any effort to break.

“I do” Phil spoke proudly, no wavering or hint of regret in his tone. Dan felt his cheeks heat up, at the fact that Phil genuinely meant what he had said.

“Daniel James Howell, do you take Philip Michael Lester to be your lawfully wedded husband?” Samantha asked, the eagerness not having dissipated from her eyes.

“I do” Dan replied, breaking into a wide smile, causing Phil to do the same.

“In which case it gives me great pleasure in pronouncing you as a lawfully married couple, you can kiss each other now” Samantha announced as she dropped her hands to her sides and smiled on as Dan and Phil shared their first kiss as a married couple, tender and sweet. They were together for life, and there was genuinely nothing of them could ever fathom as wanting more.

“We will now conduct the signing of the register” Samantha stated as she walked over to stand beside Tracey, who called Phil over to sign first. As Dan stood waiting for his turn, he looked over to his and Phil’s families, who were all still recovering from the vows. Kaylee was still babbling unintelligibly, and Dan was about to pick her up, but Phil gently tapped him on the shoulder and pointed over to the table with the register, swiftly kissing Dan again as he passed.

Phil looked over to Louise, whose makeup had completely shifted south, and the mountain of tissues she had piled in her lap. He smiled at his friends who were located all around the room, and were overjoyed that so many people were here to share in his and Dan’s happiness, it was a surreal feeling, that he never ever wanted to leave. He walked over to pick up Kaylee, after hugging his parents (and parents-in-law) and getting countless congratulatory pats on the back and handshakes.

He held his daughter in his arms whilst he waited for Dan to return, and when he did, and their brothers and Louise were signing the register as official witnesses, they both kissed either side of their daughter’s head, of which many people snapped photographs.  

As soon as all the signing was done, Dan and Phil had to return to the table for photographs with the witnesses for their wedding album, and grinned widely, holding up their ring hands.

“Ladies and gentlemen, please be upstanding as I introduce you for the very first time to the Howell-Lesters!” Samantha declared happily, and Dan and Phil stood up with their daughter and linked hands as the whole room applauded them.

“If you would all like to vacate the room and make your way outside, we will conduct the traditional confetti throwing and picture taking on the steps. If you have not got confetti, some will be available for purchase in reception” Samantha explained as the guests slowly got up to leave, and made their way out of the room back down the corridor.

After handing Kaylee over to Zoe, both Dan and Phil waited until the room was otherwise empty. Both fell to their feet, lacking in strength to stay upright.

“Crying really takes it out of you” Dan joked, and Phil laughed as well as nodded in agreement, but soon the obvious dawned.

“Hey, hey, hey. We’re married. Like actually legally married, you’re stuck with me” Phil stated, looking down at his ring to accentuate the fact.

“My idea of heaven” Dan replied as he pulled Phil in for a lengthy kiss, far more passionate than the previous competitors.

They were just attempting to comprehend the fact they were actually married (‘like grown ups’ Dan would add comically) when high heels digging into the plush carpet interrupted them.

“Um, we can’t really have wedding pictures without the marri- oh” Louise stopped herself mid-sentence as she walked in on her two newlywed friends close to embarking into a makeout session.

“Right, that is correct, right, we’ll be, just, um” Phil babbled, his embarrassment speaking for him, and sent a pleading look to his husband.

“We’ll be out in a second” Dan answered with a smile, and Louise nodded in understanding before turning on her heel and heading back down the corridor.  

Whilst Phil was sporting a furious blush, Dan steadied himself onto his feet and helped Phil to the same position, and they looked into each other’s eyes with the widest smiles they could manage.

“After you hubby, our adoring public awaits” Dan gestured to the door and Phil raised an eyebrow.

“Never call me that again” he replied with a playful eye roll as he set to walk out of the room, but Dan stayed put as he watched Phil walk away, and placed both hands to his cheeks, smiling as the coolness of his wedding ring made contact with his flushed cheek. His lips parted as he spun around to look at the décor a final time, and walked over to the table where they had signed their official marriage register, which now displayed a blank page, as Tracey had taken his and Phil’s to be processed.

However, he could still see the imprints of where they wrote, and he felt weak at the knees when he saw Phil’s neatest handwriting read _‘Philip Howell-Lester’,_ and his own handwriting beside it faintly reading ‘ _Daniel Howell-Lester’._ They had promised themselves to each other in the eyes of anyone and everyone, and that made Dan giddy, but he also felt a little dizzy just thinking about it, the phrase ‘drunk on love’ sprung to mind.

Never had an overused cliché seemed ever so fitting.

\--

Phil could see most of their guests crowded outside of the building, almost all of them holding colourful little boxes, ready to throw the contents at himself and his husband as soon as they stepped outside.

The husband that was still missing from his side.

“Dan?” he called behind him, and almost immediately Dan strolled out of the ceremony room, taking hold of Phil’s hand as he stood beside him.

“Are you alright?” he asked, and Dan nodded rapidly.

“Just trying to take it all in” he replied softly, and Phil nodded in understanding.

“You did great” Phil whispered, just so none of the guests or employees would hear that were roaming about the lobby.

“You did too, I’m sorry I kind of lost it when you were speaking, I can’t control myself when I’m as bad as I was, I completely soaked our shoes” Dan laughed as he looked down at both sets of leather shoes, which still had remnants of the dots that Dan caused with his tears.

Phil shook his head with a laugh and pulled Dan into a run, and they ran onto the front steps of the building with grins and skips in their steps. Their photographer captured the very first moment they stepped out, and the guests were preparing their confetti to release on the photographer’s prompt.

“Okay, confetti at the ready in three, two, one!” the photographer shouted as the guests all cheered, and Dan and Phil were both showered in confetti of all kinds, but one stuck out the most.

Phil picked a piece of the paper from Dan’s hair and held it between them, a pink piece of confetti shaped like a cherry blossom. They both shared a giggle as they shook their heads, thinking of which of their friends decided to throw in a reference to their Japan trip.

“Big smiles, boys!” the photographer shouted, and Dan and Phil both beamed widely as the held up their ring hands, and the photographer took a few more shots of it. With no warning, Dan wrapped his arms around Phil’s neck and pulled him into a deep kiss, whilst the photographer got more pictures, and for once Dan was uncaring of the opinions of the people around him. He’d been craving this kiss for over four days, and he couldn’t wait a second longer. By the way Phil kissed back, it wasn’t hard to tell that it was very much reciprocal.

When they pulled apart, Phil rested his forehead on Dan’s, the smile never faltering.

“I can’t believe you just did that,” Phil whispered breathlessly, and Dan simply shrugged, completely disregarding everyone else around them. “Even after six years, you still manage to surprise me, Dan. I’m beginning to think I’ll never fully figure you out” he smiled as he pressed a gentle kiss on the tip of Dan’s nose.

“You’ll have the rest of our lives to find out” Dan replied in a whisper, and let his lips ghost over Phil’s for a second or two before leaning in for a long, tender kiss as they were cheered on by their closest friends and family. 

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed this monster fluffball of a fic. I went to a wedding myself the other day and the ceremony was so beautiful I just had to write something like it, so here you go. 
> 
> I also cried whilst writing this but let’s not talk about that 
> 
> Please please please let me know what you thought of this fic! xx


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